Unseen

For my friends and family who share the periodic shadow of depression.  Not all days are created equal….

selfportrait.sundance

Unseen

The barrage of advice

is endless. Use your brightest

colors, sharpest lines, be cheerful!

But eventually, we each must paint

with whatever colors we see, especially

on days like this, when your heart feels like a large

dead fish—cold and heavy and hard, when the air

has gone to syrup and all of space thickens

sinking down around your head like a dark

sheet drawn tight

and tighter

still

 

 

There are no yellows here no

gold. Today is a day for purples

and black, for indigo and blood-

red, for fat brushes marking wide sluggish

stokes over the canvas, of just trying to cover the cracks

and leave no white corners, no spaces, then signing

the work by pressing your face full-on

into the thick black paint in the

corner in the hope that you

might finally escape

this day

unseen

 

 

©Old Bones, New Snow/J.A. Fink 2014